Semper Mental
by Greer Bontro
Summary: Goren reflects on his failure to protect Eames, post ep for Blind Spot, Season 6. Complete.


Disclaimer: Dick Wolf, king of the world.

Title: _Semper Mental_

Characters: Goren, Eames, Deakins

Summary: Goren reflects on his failure to protect Eames. Post-ep for _Blind Spot, _Season 6.

Rating: T

Reviews welcome.

Detective Robert Goren sat at the bedside of his partner, Detective Alexandra Eames, at the NYU Downtown Hospital. There was an oxygen clip in her nose. Several wires snaked under the covers to electrodes monitoring her heart and respiration. Two IV's were flowing into her right arm. Her face and arms bore the bruises and lacerations she received at the hands of her kidnapper. There was a gauze bandage wrapped around her head like an exercise sweatband.

Goren thought he was going to vomit. If there had actually been any food in his stomach, he certainly might have, but he had not eaten in hours. He had failed his partner miserably. He had failed his Eames. Partners always had each other's back. He had let her walk out of One P.P. at 2 a.m. into a deserted parking garage. Let her drive home alone and walk into an empty, darkened house in the middle of a case involving a wacko serial killer. _What the hell were you thinking?_ _Would she hold him accountable? The way he held himself accountable? Would she ever be able to trust him again?_

_Christ almighty, when I received that text message from Eames' cell phone indicating that Sebastian had her…I thought my head would explode. Then Declan and I were surrounded on the street by NYPD complete with sirens, flashing lights and guns drawn. Luckily we were not shot, for crying out loud. Can't name the last time I had to hit the ground and put my hands behind my head. Probably never. And then they found Eames' cell phone in Declan's briefcase. I didn't know what to think. _

_I am so proud of Alex Eames. The way she cut herself loose from being hung up like a side of beef. Ripping the tape off her face, getting herself down, using the electrical wire to blow the door lock; then scaling the wall to that window to call for help. All in a pair of high heels! Whoever said women were the weaker sex was fooling himself. _

_Above it all, I feel that I have disgraced myself by not being able to find her. Mr. Hotshot Profiler….Shit! Between Declan and me we couldn't find a damn drunk on the Bowery. But we were looking for a serial killer, not for a bitter daughter. I should have seen it…I SHOULD HAVE FUCKIN' SEEN IT! Even if Declan couldn't._

_All those years I watched him treat his daughter as second-class. It never even registered in my brain. I was too busy basking in the sunshine of his approval and mentoring. Add that to my shame in these horrible events._

"Bobby….," whispered Eames softly, with what was left of her voice.

_God….if I had paid attention back then maybe I could have prevented this from ever happening…two innocent women dead and Eames nearly so…_

"Bobby…," she managed a little louder.

This time he heard her and looked up. He was already holding her delicate left hand in his huge hands. She gave his hand a weak squeeze.

"Shh…just rest…you're safe now. Alex, I …I am so sorry….I should have…""

Alex nodded, then whispered, "Bobby….I can hear you… thinking… Cut it out."

"You..you can hear me… thinking?"

"Blaming yourself….knock it off...you're making yourself crazy…_semper mental._"

"_Semper mental?_ Always crazy? Since when…do you speak Latin?"

"Shut up."

He opened his mouth, but nothing came out, so he closed it again. He figured he was safe from her infamous right hook at the moment. Only because there were IV tubes stuck in it.

"Bobby…it's not your fault."

"If only I'd…"

"Don't make me get out of this damn bed so I can smack some sense into you, Goren."

That brought a smile to his face. Big, bad Bobby Goren was being threatened by his petite 120 lb. partner from her hospital bed. He feared she might actually try to get out of bed, so he thought it best to humor her.

"Whatever you say, _MacGyver_."

She just rolled her eyes, but she was too exhausted to give him anymore of her sass.

Bobby poured some water from a pitcher on her bedside table into a cup with a straw. Held it so she could sip from from the straw. That activity seemed to tire her out even more. She leaned back on her pillows and closed her eyes. He pushed her hair out of her face, so it was behind her ear. Softly kissed her on the forehead. Then sat back in the visitor's chair and closed his eyes. Envisioned himself climbing into bed with her to hold her and keep her safe, but knew it would not go over well with the hospital staff. He remained in his chair and moments later they were both sound asleep.

That's how the next visitor found them. Jimmy Deakins had needed to see that Alex Eames was still in one piece. Grimaced at the sight of her hooked up to all that equipment. But, when he saw Goren asleep in the chair by her bed, he knew they would both be OK. He ripped a piece of paper from his pocket notepad and scribbled a brief message. Left it on her bedside table. He'd be back again.

No matter who was commanding Major Case, they would still always be _his detectives._ Some bonds can never be broken.

FIN.


End file.
